This is a true story. In the early 1990's I was living and working in The Haague, The Netherlands when a good friend invited me to visit her for the weekend in Berlin. I thought, sure, no problem - I'll just catch a short train ride from Holland across the boarder into east Germany.
I purchased my tickets online pleased that I only had to worry about one train change in Maastricht. As we approached the station I knew I only had 10 short minutes to change trains. But were was my track? Feeling anxious and slightly disoriented, I politely asked the conductor about which track was the train for Berlin departing from? Track 7.
Whew. I made it. No problem. Sitting comfortably in my assigned seat, the train departed and I was once again on my way to Berlin.
About 90 minutes into the journey, the train conductor came around to collect tickets. He looked at my ticket, then at me, then my ticket once again and asked "Where is your final destination?" I answered "Berlin" of course. He looked at me puzzled and and said, "This train is headed to BELIN not BERLIN!"
Yikes! I was on the wrong train headed in the wrong direction! And to make matters even worse, there was no planned stop so I could disembark and go back to Maastricht and even if there was, I missed my train!
I ended up travelling to Groningham in the north of the Netherlands. The train conducotr explained my situation to the station staff who took pity on a poor, confused, and highly entertaining young American traveller. I was escorted to the train scheduled to depart in the morning at 7AM back to Maastricht and told I could sleep in the wagon car. Well, at least it was warm, I had a place to sleep, and I was sure I was on the right train!
As this was pre-mobile days, I phoned my friends in Berlin on a fixed line from Groningham to notify them of my mistake. Happy to report that I did eventually make it to Berlin and had a very enjoyable weekend.
Don't assume the person you're talking too understands what your'e trying to say. They may shake their head in acknowledgement but how they interpret your words may be very different than what you are trying to say. People selectively hear parts of a conversation or focus only on certain words, but miss the meaning entirely. Why? Because most people listen with the intent to reply, not to understand.
My top 5 tips to ensure you make it to Berlin and not Belin:
- Ask probing questions to confirm the recipient understands what your'e saying.
- Ask the person to repeat your question or comment.
- Use visual ques or props if appropriate to reinforce your message.
- Anticipate potential ways your message could be misinterpreted.
- Ask more than one person the same question and compare answers.